Dark Empathic Leadership | Emotional Intelligent Leaders Who Cause Poor Performance

In the high-stakes world of pharmaceuticals, one executive – let’s call her Alex – consistently delivered results.

Charismatic, insightful, and emotionally attuned, Alex seemed to know exactly what her team needed to stay motivated. Under her guidance, sales increased, and team members initially felt valued and engaged.

But as time passed, cracks began to appear. Behind closed doors, Alex subtly undermined colleagues who challenged her, often framing it as “feedback” to improve performance. She used her insights into team dynamics to influence outcomes, rarely taking personal accountability for the fallout.

Over time, team morale waned, trust eroded, and turnover spiked.

Alex was a classic example of a "dark empathic" leader – leveraging empathy, not for connection, but to gain control.

At first, it felt like she really understood us. But over time, you started to realise that her concern was never about us as a team—it was always about how we could serve her goals.” — Former direct report of Alex


Dark empathic leaders present a unique challenge to organisations, blending high emotional intelligence with traits of the “dark triad”: narcissism, machiavellianism, and psychopathy.

These leaders can appear caring but often use empathy to manipulate and control for self-serving purposes. Despite these risks, they can bring certain advantages, especially in high-pressure environments, if their tendencies are managed carefully.

This article explores the complexity of dark empathic leadership and offers strategies for effectively identifying, developing, and managing these leaders for the benefit of team cohesion and ethical alignment. 

It provides an overview of the psychological research in the following areas:

What is Dark Empathy  

The term “dark empathy” refers to individuals who combine high emotional intelligence with traits commonly associated with the “dark triad” of personality: narcissism, machiavellianism, and psychopathy. Unlike traditional dark personalities, dark empaths leverage empathy to achieve self-serving goals, understanding others' feelings and needs yet using that insight manipulatively.

Research suggests that dark empathic leaders thrive in environments where they can leverage charm and emotional understanding for influence, subtly prioritising personal objectives over ethical leadership. This phenomenon is increasingly recognised as a complex form of manipulative behaviour in workplaces, where empathy is used strategically rather than ethically (Heym, Firth, & Elsey, 2019).

I use empathy to understand my team’s motivations. It’s easier to achieve my goals when I know what drives them.” — Anonymous dark empathic leader

A growing body of research indicates that dark empathy is more common than previously thought, especially in leadership roles. Studies on emotional intelligence in leadership have shown that while high empathy is typically associated with prosocial behaviours, leaders with dark triad traits can use empathy as a tool for manipulation rather than genuine connection.

For example, leaders who combine dark triad traits with high Emotional Intelligence can create environments of selective empathy and strategic trust-building, which serves their own interests rather than team or organisational well-being (Wisse & Sleebos, 2016).

The hardest part was realising that the support he showed was all an act. His empathy was just a tactic.” — Colleague of a dark empathic leader

How do you Recognise a Dark Empathic Leader?

The following 6 characteristics are commonly found in dark empathic leaders, enabling them to use empathy as a vehicle for manipulation rather than for connection or team support:

  1. Empathy as a Manipulative Tool: They may seem genuinely concerned for team welfare but use insights selectively to serve personal agendas. This aligns with findings on how emotional intelligence can be applied manipulatively, where high empathy can be exploited to achieve self-serving goals rather than fostering positive relational development (Kilduff, Chiaburu, & Menges, 2010).

  2. Charisma and Surface-Level Charm: Often highly charismatic, dark empathic leaders use charm as a strategic tool to gain trust and influence, making their manipulative intentions difficult to detect. This aligns with findings that leaders with dark triad traits, particularly narcissism, rely on charm to garner loyalty and support, using charisma to mask self-interest (Judge, Piccolo, & Kosalka, 2009).

  3. Self-Preservation: These leaders focus intensely on reputation and position, shaping their decisions around self-interest and protection of their status. A study in Organizational Behaviour and Human Decision Processes highlights how leaders with high self-preservation motives are more likely to manipulate others to secure their position and influence within organisations, often framing their actions as team-focused when they’re primarily self-serving (Campbell, Hoffman, Campbell, & Marchisio, 2011).

  4. Selective Empathy: Dark empathic leaders tend to show empathy selectively, focusing on people who can advance their own goals. A study in Personality and Individual Differences noted that leaders with dark triad traits, such as Machiavellianism, frequently show selective empathy, using it to foster loyalty from some while dismissing others who hold less strategic value (Paulhus & Williams, 2002).

  5. Emotional Contingency: These leaders are emotionally unpredictable, using controlled displays of emotion to create dependency among team members. Research published in the Journal of Applied Psychology found that leaders with manipulative tendencies often display volatile emotions to keep others off balance, creating a dynamic where employees become dependent on the leader’s approval (O’Boyle, Forsyth, Banks, & McDaniel, 2012).

  6. Boundary-Pushing: Dark empathic leaders exploit their understanding of others' needs to push boundaries, often framing exploitative demands as “opportunities for growth.” A study in Leadership Quarterly underscores that leaders with high Machiavellianism often push team boundaries, justifying such actions as necessary for team development while prioritising personal gain (Jonason, Slomski, & Partyka, 2012).

I enjoy mentoring and guiding people, but only if they’re adding value to my own projects. Empathy just helps me get the most out of them.” — Anonymous dark empathic leader

Why Should Organisations Be Concerned About Dark Empathic Leaders?

While dark empathic leaders may bring quick wins and charisma to a team, they pose significant long-term risks:

  • Erosion of Trust: Manipulation disguised as empathy erodes trust, leading to disengagement. Research by Spain, Harms, and LeBreton (2014) illustrates how dark personality traits in leadership, even those with high emotional intelligence, can create environments where trust is gradually eroded.

  • Increased Burnout and Turnover: Employees under dark empathic leaders may feel emotionally drained and undervalued, leading to higher burnout and turnover (Babiak, Neumann, and Hare 2010).

  • Cultural Contamination: Research in Leadership Quarterly by Boddy (2011) shows how Dark Empathic Leaders shift team culture towards self-interest and competition, which undermines collaboration and positive engagement necessary for team success.

  • Psychological Safety Risks: Teams led by dark empathic leaders often lack the psychological safety required for open communication (Frazier et al. 2017).

  • Misalignment with Organisational Values: Dark empathic leaders may undermine core organisational values like transparency and integrity, creating internal conflicts (Mathieu, Neumann, Hare, and Babiak 2014).

  • Subtle Undermining of Peers and Processes: These leaders frequently engage in strategic undermining of colleagues to maintain control and power (Jonason, Slomski, and Partyka 2012).

Working for him was exhausting. He always knew what to say to keep you loyal, but looking back, it was all about what he could get from us.” — Former team member of a dark empathic leader

Advantages of Dark Empathic Leaders

While dark empathic leaders bring significant challenges, it should be recognised they also offer advantages to organisations, that can be leveraged if managed carefully.

Dark Empathic Leaders’ strengths are:

  • High Charisma and Influence: Dark empathic leaders are often charismatic and persuasive, which can be beneficial for rallying teams and influencing stakeholders. Research by Judge, Piccolo, and Kosalka (2009) found that leaders with charismatic traits are more successful in driving team motivation and engagement, which can be strategically useful for achieving challenging goals.

  • Strong Strategic Insight: Their heightened understanding of others’ emotions allows them to read situations and people effectively, making them strong strategists. Kilduff, Chiaburu, and Menges (2010) noted that leaders with high emotional intelligence, particularly those who are adept at perceiving others’ emotions, are better able to anticipate needs and strategically position themselves, which can be valuable in competitive or high-stakes environments.

  • Resilience Under Pressure: Dark empathic leaders often exhibit high stress resilience, enabling them to perform well in challenging conditions. O’Boyle, Forsyth, Banks, and McDaniel (2012) found that leaders with high emotional resilience are better equipped to handle organisational stressors, maintaining performance in high-pressure situations where other leaders may struggle.

  • Ability to Drive Results: Their ambition and drive for achievement can lead to impressive short-term results, making them effective in roles that require quick outcomes. According to Boddy (2011), dark traits such as narcissism and Machiavellianism can drive performance in competitive settings, where the ability to focus intensely on outcomes is often rewarded.

  • Skill in Navigating Complex Relationships: Their talent for building strategic alliances and navigating organisational politics can be advantageous in large, matrixed organisations. Babiak, Neumann, and Hare (2010) highlight that dark empathic leaders’ political skill allows them to negotiate complex organisational landscapes effectively, which can be an asset in settings where alliances are critical to success.

What Makes Leaders Turn into Dark Empathic Leaders?

Leaders who turn into dark empathic leaders often start with a combination of personality predispositions, situational pressures, and unmet psychological needs, which, together, create a kind of “toxic fuel” that drives self-serving and manipulative behaviours. Research by Jonason, Lyons, Bethell, and Ross (2013) suggests that leaders with strong needs for control and status, particularly those who lack personal security or have deep-seated fears of vulnerability, may use empathy strategically to maintain their influence, concealing insecurities behind a façade of caring.

Moreover, organisational cultures that prioritise results over ethical processes tend to reinforce these traits. When manipulation and strategic empathy are rewarded for driving outcomes, leaders quickly learn that influence tactics—however manipulative—are acceptable as long as they produce results (Den Hartog & Belschak, 2012).

Leaders with high emotional intelligence but low self-awareness are also particularly prone to dark empathic behaviours. This discrepancy enables them to read others’ emotions accurately without examining their own motives, which often leads to empathy being used as a tool for control rather than for genuine connection (Cote, Lopes, Salovey, & Miners, 2010).

Furthermore, early career success achieved through manipulation creates a positive feedback loop, reinforcing these behaviours as effective strategies for advancement (Blickle, Schütte, & Wihler, 2012). For some, the influence of toxic mentors or role models compounds this effect; when leaders witness mentors successfully employing dark triad traits, they are more likely to adopt similar behaviours, especially in competitive or high-stakes environments (O’Reilly, Doerr, Caldwell, & Chatman, 2013).

Combined, these factors create a cycle where toxic fuel—stress, external pressures, and learned manipulation—pushes leaders toward dark empathic behaviours, undermining both their own well-being and that of their teams.

Cross-Cultural Differences in Dark Empathy Leadership

Cultural expectations play a significant role in shaping leadership behaviours, including the potential for dark empathic traits. In individualistic cultures, such as the United States, leadership often emphasizes personal achievement and self-reliance, which can inadvertently fuel self-serving or manipulative tendencies in leaders predisposed to dark empathy (House, Hanges, Javidan, Dorfman, & Gupta, 2004).

In contrast, collectivist cultures, such as Japan or South Korea, value harmony and group cohesion, potentially mitigating some aspects of dark empathic behaviour by encouraging leaders to prioritize team welfare over personal gains.

However, even in collectivist cultures, dark empathic leaders may still leverage strategic empathy to navigate complex interpersonal dynamics and reinforce their control, adapting their behaviours to meet cultural expectations while subtly serving their own agendas.

These cultural influences suggest that developing an understanding of cross-cultural differences is essential for accurately identifying and managing dark empathic traits in global leadership contexts.

How can EQ Assessments help Develop Dark Empathic Leaders?

We would argue that Emotional intelligence (EQ) assessments are essential for identifying and developing dark empathic leaders. Personality assessments reveal stable traits but often miss the complex, situational behaviours of dark empathic leaders.

EQ assessments, on the other hand, highlight how leaders apply emotional intelligence, uncovering whether empathy is used constructively or manipulatively. Unlike personality tools, EQ assessments provide context-specific insights, making it easier to identify leaders who might use emotional skills for self-serving purposes. This makes EQ assessments essential for guiding leaders toward ethical, transparent behaviours that align with organisational values (Kilduff, Chiaburu, & Menges, 2010).

Yet it should be noted that few EQ assessments offer the nuanced perspective needed to address these complex traits. Many assessments operate on the assumption that high EQ scores are inherently positive, without considering how traits like empathy combined with other traits might be misused in the occupational context.

Effective EQ assessments should go beyond measuring levels of empathy to explore how it interacts with traits like decisiveness, influence, and stress resilience, revealing where empathy could turn manipulative when combined with other traits.

Occupational context-sensitive assessments such as The EBW Business EQ Assessment allow leaders to understand the real impact of their emotional behaviours on their teams and organisational culture.

As one practitioner observed,

“High empathy isn’t always positive; it needs context and balance.”

When choosing an EQ assessment for leaders, look for one that:

  • Evaluates emotional traits within role-specific and organisational contexts rather than assuming “higher is better.”

  • Balances empathy with related traits like decisiveness, influence, and adaptability to reveal how these traits interact.

  • Provide a framework for actionable insights on the alignment of emotional behaviours with ethical leadership rather than focusing only on emotional awareness.

  • Includes training for practitioners to develop expertise in EQ across diverse cultural and organisational settings, enabling them to help leaders interpret results and apply insights constructively.

Best Practice Tips for working with Dark Empathic Leaders

Identifying a dark empathic leader is only the first step; the key challenge lies in motivating them to behave in a way that is more acceptable to those they lead and to leverage their strengths in a way that aligns with the organisation’s long-term goals.

This is no easy feat and requires careful consideration about the ethics of leadership development, especially if you are working with leaders whose style of leadership may not reflect your values and approach but is delivering short-term success to the organisation.

Here are some best practices for Developing Dark Empathic Leaders

  • Provide In-Depth Self-Awareness Insights: Start by helping dark empathic leaders understand the impact of their emotional drivers on both team dynamics and organisational culture. Tools like the EBW Business EQ assessment allow certified practitioners to offer nuanced insights that reveal how these leaders’ behaviours affect their effectiveness.

  • Reframe Strengths Towards Ethical Goals: Dark empathic leaders often have the potential for strong influence. Use feedback sessions to guide them in redirecting these strengths toward ethical, long-term objectives. Demonstrate how aligning their approach with the organisation’s goals not only benefits the team but also enhances their own metrics of success, such as recognition, influence, and professional reputation.

  • Emphasise the Value of Trust and Psychological Safety: Encourage leaders to build a culture of trust and psychological safety. By fostering open communication and a supportive environment, leaders can cultivate stronger team loyalty and higher performance. Show them how prioritising team well-being ultimately serves their own ambitions and supports sustainable, impactful leadership.

  • Offer Targeted, Continuous Feedback: Regular, constructive feedback helps dark empathic leaders adjust behaviours over time. Through consistent guidance, they learn to focus on collaborative success and ethical leadership, allowing them to experience the benefits of alignment with organisational values.

  • Leverage EBW Certified Partners for Specialised Guidance: Certified EBW Business EQ Partners are skilled in navigating the complexities of dark empathic traits. They provide a safe and knowledgeable space for leaders to explore personal growth, aligning personal motives with broader organisational goals.

As one EBW Certified Partner notes,

“It’s about showing them that long-term success is better achieved through ethical leadership. EBW’s nuanced assessment allows us to speak their language while guiding them towards healthier leadership practices.

By applying these strategies, organisations can transform dark empathic leaders into powerful assets, promoting a healthier, more sustainable approach to leadership that balances influence with integrity.

 

Conclusion 

Dark empathic leaders represent a complex challenge for organisations. While their ability to empathise can be beneficial, their lack of ethical grounding makes them a hidden threat.

Using Emotional Intelligent psychometrics like the EBW Business EQ Assessment can help identify these tendencies early, helping organisations foster feedback and ethical leadership. In doing so, they can promote a healthier, more sustainable organisational culture that prioritises trust, integrity, and long-term success.

 

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The EBW Global Team

We are the Business Emotional Intelligence experts. We help organisations get the best from people by using Business Emotional Intelligence (Business EQ) to improve lives by changing how leaders and teams work together. Our Business Emotional Intelligence assessments, tools and programmes enable you to get the best out of your people and make the best data-driven decisions where ever you or your candidates are in the world.

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